Written by Ashton Deroy

‘Here Ashton Deroy goes again stigmatizing Autism based on their own personal experience.” My response is ‘Shut up we do struggle and it can get ugly!”

Check out the NDP Word Doc on why we need Universal mental health. I am not a Mental Health expert. I am talking on behalf of crazy people. Not on behalf of the experts.

What is stalking? It is to pursue someone often through following them. Sometimes to proceed with Criminal action. Although I have never stalked someone with Criminal intent. I have proceeded to seek out people for attention. Or I would do actions to embarrass someone cause I was upset with them. Just like my Mother had done.

Why do we Stalk? Intimacy Seeking, Delusional behavior, Anger and Desperation.

Intimacy seeking – You think they are your soulmate. Think they need to fall in love with you. The Intimacy seeking stalker I had? They were projecting me as some kind of source of humble normalcy. To Scare them off? I brought out my vain personality 1000%. I started say I was God. On the flip side I have tried the approach of being someone that someone else would find desirable. This is usually done by me trying to be too nice. It is exhausting to try and be who people want you to be.

Delusional behavior – Apparently a gentleman followed a Professor around in the USA and the man thought he was Sean Pen. I really can’t explain this one too much. You would need an expert psyche to explain it. Even they might be confused. My Delusions were along the lines of grandiose personality, Hearing voices and seeing ghosts. They really didn’t inspire any kind of stalking behavior.

Anger – This is one of the more predatory versions of stalking. Like following someone to seek revenge. If you do this kind? In my non-expert opinion. You need strong anti-psychotics. I once tried to embarrass someone at work. I deeply regret doing it. I was just dealing with feelings of total abandonment.

Desperation – My Mom often Desperation stalks her family when she is having financial or emotional problems. Treats the family like it is their job to fix her. I think I may of tried something similar after my concussion. For the record if I was going through that desperation again? I would definitely write angrily about people on my blog. I would not seek them out or follow them. Cause it is not their job to fix me. It It just also isn’t my job to die quietly. I want people to be able to find my voice after I die. I want it to haunt them! What it is like to be raised by an always ill Narcisist? By Ashton Deroy.

How do we stop?

Get help immediately. 1. See a Counselor or Counselor(s) . 2. Try to find a pathway of realistic Independence. 3. Fill your life with more exciting things. 4. Get a Job.

1. See a Counselor or Counselors – If you got to get unlicensed help with this. Then Get unlicensed help to. I am aware licensed help is not always affordable. The point is you have something wrong with you. You need to talk something out. The person you follow without their consent? They can’t do that for you.
2. Try to find a pathway to independence – I strongly believe stalkers are people who were not raised to have their own healthy relationships. Cause of my Mom & various relatives this description suits me. (Dad’s side of the family helps.) You need to find a way to be okay being by yourself. Then you will not have that type of emptiness that compels you to flip out on people and follow them.
3. Fill your life with more excitement – Face it stalking someone is unrewarding and boring. Someone doesn’t want you in your life and you are attempting to push them towards you. Relationships just do not work like that. There are more exciting things to do than follow people. Go to a gym, ride the train or Smoke a ton of weed. Anything is better than going out and obsessing on another human being who doesn’t return your feelings. Or want to help you.
4. Get a job – As soon as I could have a job after my concussion. I got a job. Cause obsessing on feuds & my ex. Wasn’t going to get me anywhere positive.

Seeking closure is not stalking and people need to stop pretending it is.

I need to add this here. Seeking closure is not stalking. Period. Now to the reader. Getting that closure is not always going to be possible. In that case you need to train yourself to let go. To people who famously ghost people then accuse them of stalking. GROW UP IMMEDIATELY! In this age of blocking and not explaining yourself. People are going to seek you out for a reason. Detachment is not easy for every individual. You need to treat people better than you do if you have a pattern of ghosting them.

Stalking is complicated topic. I don’t like that it is always dealt with from a Criminal intent way of seeing things. We are so abusive in how we view each other from this individualistic lens of society. Obviously predatory angry stalkers need to be dealt with. As well as certain intimacy stalkers who commit sexual assault. However… Sometimes accused stalking is done by desperate and confused individuals. What is one of the first things YouTube experts point out about stalkers? They don’t understand social cues, they are awkward and show signs of mental illness. Sounds like in some cases the accused stalking could have to do with desperate mental illness seeking help or validation from the wrong source. That we expect people to be able to afford to treat themselves? Is nothing short of a joke. Most Violent mental illness comes from someone who lived in aggressive Poverty too long. I don’t need statistic to show me this. It is something you inherently understand like a cliché. Especially when you are ex special Ed and a lot of your peers end up in situations of desperation. This is why we need Universal mental health. Crazy people often can’t afford to get their own treatments. (This should not be news). I’ve checked and my Special Ed peers are okay with me referring to them as crazy people. That is how society sees them anyways.