Written by Ashton Deroy

Tried to enjoy a conversation with Gary Hall on 1/19/2024. It didn’t work. All he does is fixate on old issues. As a result a friend of mine made the art featured above. I can’t reveal who? This is truly their masterpiece.

Sometimes the best way to change a behavior is to write something down about it. I have to stop trying to be friends with Gary Hall.

I met Gary Hall in Chess Club in High School. I have Autism. I guess he had his own handicap as well. I think readers should definitely acknowledge this. Below is where things start to get weird.

Why do I have to stop trying to be friends? He has been engaging in a problematic unwanted advances & sexual dialogue as recently as December 2022, he love bombed me well I was homeless & coping with a head injury in 2020. Also there is the very real possibility that all there is left of the friendship is me taunting them.

Sexual dialogue

No one should be using someone with a mental health injury for sex. If sex happens in the process of being there for a loved one that is ok. If you create a or enhance a vulnerability to exploit it for sex. You are a Sociopath. I think in some of the talking online. Gary Hall was trying to angle me so he could sexually exploit emotional vulnerabilities. As a narcissistic person who is anti-social. I don’t like emotionally charged sexual engagement. It is uncomfortable. I don’t think he realized how much he was actually ticking me off!

Love bombing From my perspective

I had to to decide right after breaking up with Kaylib, having my finances collapse & losing my shelter. If pursuing a relationship with Gary Hall was better than winding up alone on the street? I chose being alone on the street…. Gary Hall is prude-ish, unrealistic about intimacy and the thought of being with him made me feel gross.

Still to have to be in a decision to make this call. Especially at a time I am so vulnerable. He made everything feel harder at that time. To my readers. Never try to exploit a vulnerable situation to force intimacy on someone.

Gary also weirdly kept trying to trigger me. Related to my ex Kaylib. Potentially this was manipulative behavior. With the intention of triggering an opportune emotional state. Like the one I was in when he initially love bombed me.

Taunting and distorting

It got to the point with Gary Hall where if the conversation got too real. It got too sexual or he was emotionally probing me. In any case! I resorted to using lazy ego driven arguments such as a God Complex & pretending to have delusions. Sometimes faking intoxication during conversations. Actually it is worth noting. Intoxication & delusion did not always necessarily make Gary Hall realize it was an inappropriate time for sexual dialogue. (Bad boundaries.) However it seems to me in hindsight. The friendship was probably dead at the point I could no longer have a realistic conversation with my old friend Gary Hall.

In many ways Gary Hall made my tragedies about him. Which is actually a staple of narcissistic behavior. It does take one to know one & I am one. I’ve tried to do anything to try & get him to stop acting like he is perfect. He will not do it. I have lost my patience & the ability to care. I probably would of given him pity intimacy if he wasn’t so creepy. However the added fact that he was so sure of himself well being soo wrong at times! Just makes it so much worse. I wish he was drunk well telling me & I quote

I told him many times. I was not of sound mind when I sent Gary “nudes” . Was in the hospital for a suicide attempt relatively close to when they were sent. I told him after the fact I don’t want to address this anymore! Waiting for someone to get dumped by their boyfriend & had a head injury. That is wrong! In real life if you tell someone “I love you.” Well no one else can stand to be around them, your head is in agony constantly & you feel lost. You might think about clinging to them out of desperation. I was Homeless & hurt. It should of never been about him! His artistic critiques of my nudes were established as unwelcomed and I did not appreciate him making my injury about him. When I sobered up from my head injury? I accepted I was not attracted to them & I was petrified of his unattractive looks. I was not attracted to their manipulative judgment. I was not attracted to the confidence they have in living their life well they shouldn’t have that confidence. Truly it should not be their own! Purely because they are sober they have this undeserved confidence. Not because he is a good person, successful, wealthy, athletic or gifted in any way. I played Chess in High School but I never want to play mental chess with a predator when I am in mental distress again.

Today I am making aware The God Complex I utilized with Gary Hall was a test of Moral competency and ego protection. 2/7/2024. As a result Gary Hall will be made aware of this Blog Post starting today. I hope Gary Hall is ready to wave around a Bisexual Pride Flag. This can be counted as an outing.

Gary sincerely GO FUCK YOURSELF YOU UGLY MANIPULATIVE BASTARD!

Contact me at Ashtonderoy@gmail.com if you have any issues with this blog. However this blog will not be unpublished for any reason!

Gary Hall and Jacob are examples of me accidentally thinking I fell for disgusting men. Only for me to come to my senses and Journal about it for safe keeping. I added links back and forth from these posts. As I consider them to be on the same wave length of thought.

http://ashtonderoy.com/2024/03/01/talking-with-my-ex-on-tindr/